THAT wedding dress moment

If you don’t know then SURPRISE; I’m getting married very soon. I am super excited and really can’t wait to be married to my best friend. I was really inspired to write this blog post after I had my first experience at a first dress alteration appointment.

You know in the films and TV shows when you watch the women try on her beautiful dress and everyone cries and the bride cries and she looks stunning and everyone is just in such a happy and blissful place? Well… I didn’t get that experience AT ALL! Actually what I experienced was quite the opposite and I left feeling really down and not at all excited to wear my dress. So, after having some conversations with women who had already gone through the SAME thing I was eager to share this with you guys. I wanted to share my experience with others and see if anyone else felt the same because I hadn’t heard any stories similar to mine, which at the time made me feel isolated and alone.

DISCLAIMER… I started writing this blog post the day after I went to that appointment and had since given up on it. Yesterday I was listening to a podcast by Liv Purvis and Charlotte Jacklin called ‘The Fringe Of It’ (I’ve linked to the avast page). It’s brilliant but on it, Liv opens up about HER “THAT dress” moment and how it wasn’t how its portrayed in the media and it really inspired me to finish this post

SO… Back to where we were. I put up an Instagram story asking other women if they had had any similar experiences to me or if they felt any of the same feelings. I was SHOCKED by how many women responded and were willing to share their stories and how they felt about THAT moment. This is Livi’s story, the beautiful women in the various photos below. Liv is a wonderful lady- she’s beautiful inside and out and just has an amazing heart.

“So my wedding dress was the first one I tried on and it was totally the opposite of what I thought I wanted or would suit me. I liked it but didn’t love it. I was full time at uni and had a part time job with no car so didn’t have much time to travel round to outlets etc to find my dream wedding dress. I loved shows like ‘Say Yes to the Dress’ and I was so looking forward to this part of the wedding. Also my family were 7 hours drive away so I didn’t even get to try and find my dream dress with my mum and sister like I had hoped. I tried on lots the few times I could go to a wedding dress shop but I never had a BAM moment with any of them plus they were a lot of money for one dress for one day. Eventually it was getting close to the wedding and I was getting stressed with work and uni so I went back to the only one that I really liked, not loved, and tried it on again alone. I decided there that to get that one even though it was a lot more money and my mum would have to do quite a lot of adjustments to the dress. She used to be a bridal seamstress so it took a lot of time and work but she did it beautifully. It was a great dress but it wasn’t what I always hoped to have or the feeling I got when I tried it on. I felt great on the wedding day, mainly because I knew I got to marry Sam but I did feel pretty but not beautiful because I felt a bit more on show in a strapless dress but it was one of the best days of my life.
My fave picture of me in my dress is this first one. It’s a proper laugh rather than a posed laugh but I remember saying to my wedding photographer can you make sure you photoshop me well so I look nice in the photos and make sure my arms don’t look bad. Which shows I didn’t have huge amounts of confidence ,maybe in myself more than the dress. I love these other photos but also because I bloody loved my bouquet”
Who could blame her? These flowers are GORGEOUS!!

Who could blame her? These flowers are GORGEOUS!!

I know that body positivity is the ‘cool’ thing right now and learning to love yourself is SO important and I don’t want this post to take away from all the work I’ve done on that and the progress I have made. I’m just simply trying to share a negative experience and make it into a positive one so other women know that they are not alone.

This is my STUNNING sister who got married this July and I know she had a very similar dress story to what I was describing but she looked radiant on the day. She had the best day and loved every minute of it.

This is my absolutely GORGEOUS older sister who got married a few years ago and doesn’t she just look stunning! She didn’t have the tears moment either!

Livi looks SO happy in these photos and I’m really grateful to her that she let me use her story in this post and I really do hope that his just makes other women out there not feel so alone in a really stressful time.

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9 Comments

  1. Becky
    17th September 2018 / 7:52 pm

    Yes! Finally a true article about wedding dress shopping. It is so difficult to feel good about yourself when the media portrays such a fairytale. I didn’t cry when I tried on my wedding dress either and there is so much going on in your mind in that moment wondering if you have the right dress. Plus the stress once you have the dress to make sure it still fits as the wedding gets closer. Thanks for the reminder that we need to love ourselves. These ladies look gorgeous in their dresses.
    Congrats Lydz on your upcoming wedding. I’m sure you will look lovely!

    • Lydia White
      Author
      19th September 2018 / 4:22 pm

      Becky! I completely agree, the media creates this fairytale image of wedding dress shopping. You looked absolutely stunning on your wedding day, and you had so much fun too! Thank You very much.Can’t wait to dance the night away!

  2. Grace
    17th September 2018 / 9:18 pm

    I felt so much pressure to look amazing on my wedding day and that was probably the biggest stress for me leading up to the wedding. I feel like because of this I ended up with a dress I really wasn’t comfortable in and wasn’t at all what I had originally wanted. But I still had an amazing day and when I look back I wish I wasn’t so worried and focused on what people would think of me and just enjoyed the run up to such a special day! Thank you for such an honest blog post and Im sure you will look gorgeous on your wedding day!

    • Lydia White
      Author
      19th September 2018 / 4:21 pm

      Grace! You looked beautiful on your wedding day and I totally agree its not all about what others think of you and much more about how you feel and how much fun you had! Thank You!

  3. Michelle
    17th September 2018 / 9:41 pm

    What a ĺovely amazingly trueful blog…
    Helping brides feel ok even if they don’t and they are not alone…

    • Lydia White
      Author
      19th September 2018 / 4:19 pm

      Thanks Michelle, really appreciate this comment and I’m so pleased that you loved the post.

  4. Jade simper
    19th September 2018 / 1:32 pm

    It’s not as easy to find your dream dress as people make it to be. The movies make you think you’ll know straight away, I didn’t know straight away, I went to 5 different bridal shops and tried on so many dresses, you feel so overwhelmed after, I remember feeling like I don’t know what I want anymore. I went to one bridal shop and tired on a dress which as soon I put t in I loved it, but wasn’t 100%, I feel like it was mainly because I didn’t get the reactions I wanted. I went home after and kept thinking about the dress and looking at the pictures I took in it, I had to go back and try it. I went to another bridal shop who had the same dress but in my size, I put it on and looked in the mirror and I fell in love with the dress. My mum loved it, and from then I showed other family members and they all loved it when it fit me better. It took a lot of opinions for me to finally put a deposit down on it and I’m so glad I did. Brides have got to remember it’s about the dress you love and feel good in, I think I took others opinions to heart to much.
    Love your post Lydia

    • Lydia White
      Author
      19th September 2018 / 4:18 pm

      JADE! I LOVE this comment! I completely agree with you that it’s totally about how you feel and not how others make you feel in your dress. Thank you for sharing your story!

  5. Sharon Reed
    2nd March 2019 / 7:43 pm

    What a thought-provoking blog Lyds. All the pictures of brides in this post are stunning. More blogs like this Lyds.

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